Alandra's Lilacs

The Story of a Mother and Her Deaf Daughter

By Tressa Bowers

Categories: Biography / Memoir, Parenting / Family
Imprint: Gallaudet University Press
Paperback : 9781563680823, 132 pages, May 1999
Ebook : 9781563681554, 158 pages, October 2009
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When, in 1968, 19-year-old Tressa Bowers took her baby daughter to an expert on deaf children, he pronounced that Alandra was “stone deaf,” she most likely would never be able to talk, and she probably would not get much of an education because of her communication limitations. Tressa refused to accept this stark assessment of Alandra’s prospects. Instead, she began the arduous process of starting her daughter’s education.

Economic need forced Tressa to move several times, and as a result, she and Alandra experienced a variety of learning environments: a pure oralist approach, which discouraged signing; Total Communication, in which the teachers spoke and signed simultaneously; a residential school for deaf children, where Signed English was employed; and a mainstream public school that relied upon interpreters. Changes at home added more demands, from Tressa’s divorce to her remarriage, her long work hours, and the ongoing challenge of complete communication within their family. Through it all, Tressa and Alandra never lost sight of their love for each other, and their affection rippled through the entire family. Today, Tressa can triumphantly point to her confident, educated daughter and also speak with pride of her wonderful relationship with her deaf grandchildren. Alandra’s Lilacs is a marvelous story about the resiliency and achievements of determined, loving people no matter what their circumstances might be.


Tressa Bowers lives and works in Euless, TX.



“This engaging narrative provides good reading for anyone interested in the subject, whether serious or casual, and boldly takes on the oral vs. signing debate.”

— Library Journal

“I recommend this book mostly for new hearing parents of deaf children; they would appreciate a personal account of the consequences of one hearing parent’s decision and situation.”

— Disability Studies Quarterly

“Bowers honestly and successfully conveys the difficulties and joys of bringing up a deaf involving look at deaf culture and the alienation that can arise between the deaf and the hearing.”

— Publishers Weekly